Today is my first day all alone as a stay at home mom of two... And it's going quite well so far! Thomas and I have had story time, and run around the house a little already, Lorelai has been perfect, she's eaten once, and just sat and chilled either in her swing or in my arms. I'd say so far today has been a success! Of course it's only 9:15am... I have high hopes!
James job is giving us issues... we decided a while ago that we would wait until Lorelai came and then start looking for another job for him. Well it's a good thing too, they are seriously cutting back on hours, they only give him enough to just barely keep him full time. Which I love in some ways, he get off most days around 3 or 4, which gives us much more family time. But at the same time we aren't getting paid as much, which is hard. We are trying really hard to spend less eating out and other misc things that come up. It's not that easy... The eating out will be much easier now that I can walk and cook food again.
Oh, did I mention that? Now that Lorelai is here all my pregnancy complaints have vanished! I'm still not in great shape (being on bedrest for 2 months, and partial bedrest for 4 months really makes you out of shape) but I feel so much better! I am cleaning my house and making meals and feeling great! Here are some updates on my two beautiful chillens (that's what my mom's southern relatives call children...)
Thomas: He is the perfect big brother. For the most part he ignores her. Which is great! when he does pay attention it's because he wants to hold her, or kiss her, or hug her. I feel like it's perfect! He wants to give her his toys, and he is always so excited when she squeaks or wakes up. He also gets really concerned if she cries (which she doesn't) It's adorable
Lorelai: The perfect baby. She only cries when she's cold or hungry, and it's usually just one yell. Then she'll stop, and see what you are going to do about it. She sleeps pretty well, not as great as Thomas yet, but we're working on it :) She is so chill, we did some newborn pictures yesterday, and she was great! She is getting bigger, and it makes me a little sad, but she's still quite tiny :) We went in for a one week check up, since she had a bad rash, and she had gained some weight, which is amazing. Most newborns loose in their first week, and slowly get it back, she's sustaining her weight :)
James: not my child, but still my family :) The perfect husband. Looking for another job, and looking forward to the police academy in a few months, it should be really good training for him. He was so great, having him home was like heaven. I realized that for the rest of our lives I am going to be sad that he has to go to work... I'll have to work on it, since he has to go to work. I totally cried this morning after he left, I'm worse than my toddler...
Me: Down to pre-pregnancy weight, and then some. In my entire pregnancy I gained a total of 5lbs (I was weighed the day I was induced) and now from that weight I am down 15lbs, or 10lbs from my prebaby weight. I am starting my diet either this week or next (waiting on a few food items I need) and I can't really start exercising for another month, but I have started doing some core strengthening exercises, just a few a day, but I'm dying to get back to regular exercise, so I'm pushing the limits of post pardum exercise allowments...
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
Children
That's right, now I have children, there are 2. And I am completely in love with them both :) They are so fun! I mean, don't get me wrong, I often feel completely overwhelmed and inadequate, and James is still on his paternity leave... Next week is going to be a long week for me I think. I am truly blown away at all the emotions I can feel when looking at my little family. I love them so much. It is an all consuming kind of amazing love that is completely indescribable. The three of them are my whole world, and I'd do anything for them. And at the same time I look at Thomas and Lorelai and think "I can't do this, I can't be a mother of 2! They out number me!" and I worry that I will spend too much time with one of them, and the other will feel forgotten, or that I won't show them enough how much I love them. I am scared that I won't be able to handle everyday life, and it's kind of overwhelming. But this afternoon, we were hanging out in the living room and James was holding Lorelai, and Thomas came up and got in the chair with them, and they all just sat and watched the TV. It warmed my heart, and made me think that just maybe I could handle being a mother of two...
Friday, May 11, 2012
Birth Story
Well, she made it :) Little Miss Lorelai is here! She's perfect, and healthy, and adorable. So since this is my journal I am going to write the story of how we got her here!
On Thursday May 3rd at my weekly Dr appt the Dr suggested I have an amniocentesis the following week to see if Lorelai's lungs were mature enough to be induced. We agreed, since I was having so many issues. My hips had become increasingly worse, they both were giving out under me, I had even fallen quite a few times and bruised my hip pretty good (pretty bad?). So we were scheduled for Tuesday at 10:15 am. On Monday morning I was feeling pretty bad, and depressed. So James called in sick to help take care of Thomas and I, and just to kind of have some time together. It was a really nice day actually, we got some stuff done, and played with Thomas a lot. So Tuesday came, Michelle and MarJean came to watch Thomas and James and I went to the hospital. The nurse came out and called for Michelle, I waited a second, and since I was the only one in the waiting room said "I'm Amanda MICHELLE" and she laughed and said, "Oh, yes! Sorry, I was reading the wrong part of the form!" So we were rolled back (I was in a wheelchair) and they did a nice long ultrasound to check her out, and find a place for the needle. The dr came in and told us all of the risks, which included her being born (kinda the point of the test) and possibly nicking the umbilical cord, in which case I'd have an immediate emergency c-section. This was like a 1 in 1000 chance, but it sure sounded bad... We agreed, feeling that it was best to do the test. So they put the needle in the first time, and boy was Lorelai uncooperative! She kept moving in the way, and wouldn't stay still long enough to do the test. Well they put the needle in and Lorelai literally grabbed the umbilical cord and moved it toward the needle. Well that was too close for the Dr, so she took it out (I was fine with it! Babies safety is way more important than anything else!) unfortunately that meant that she had to put the needle in my stomach again... The second time hurt a lot more than the first. But they were able to get the sample, and then we had a NST while we waited for the results. So about half an hour later we got the results, and obviously it was that her lungs were mature! So the nurse tells us this, and speaks to my Dr on the phone, and the nurse tells us to go home, and they would call us to let us know when to get back. So long story short, we go home and wait, and wait and wait, finally about 5 hours later I called the Dr, only to find out she was trying to get a hold of me the whole time, the nurse was crazy. We were supposed to go straight from the test over to Labor and Delivery, WHAT? So we hurridly find a sitter, and get everything together, and head to the hospital. Get all checked in and they start hooking me up and what not. We got there about 5pm, they started the pitocin at around 6, and by 8 nothing was happening... We were just waiting. So I sent James to get some dinner, I knew we would be up all night and the hospital only serves food during the day. So he got some Carl's Jr and I just kind of chilled, and waited. Still nothing happened. So around 10 the Dr came in to see me, and she suggested we break my water so we can jump start everything and start doing internal monitoring because the external one wasn't working very well. So around 10:30-11 we broke my water and my contractions came in at full force. Right on top of each other, like 1 min apart. So I got the epidural, I figured there was no use in waiting, and boy was I right. I got the epidural around 11:30, and the nurse came in to check a little later, maybe 20 min, and I was at 9 cm. Before they broke my water I was 3cm. So between 11 and 11:30 I made it 6 cm, and then by midnight I was 10, and getting ready to push. The Dr came in and started getting everything ready, and by 12:30 we started to push. She was born 15 minutes later. Perfect, and beautiful. She had a full head of dark hair, and I was so excited! They let us keep her for about an hour and she nursed and we smiled and laughed and hugged her. Then they took her to the nursery for a bath, and I made my way to our room. I got all cleaned up, and James and Lorelai came back. We cuddled a while, and then I asked the nurse to take her to the nursery. I wasn't sure if I would have woken up if she cried, and James was exhausted. So we sent her to be taken care of, and slept for a few hours. Of course they kept bugging me and taking my BP and giving me shots, ect. Well the baby slept for 6 hours! I was so sad I didn't get to sleep that whole time too! The next day we had a lot of visitors, and Thomas LOVED the baby. He just wanted to hold her and kiss her, it was so adorable! He had so much fun seeing her! We left on Thursday afternoon, because I wanted to get home for Thomas. I would have liked to stay and have the nurses a little longer, but I felt like Thomas needed to come home. Well, that's the story so far! We are so excited to have her home, and we are very blessed to have such beautiful children!
On Thursday May 3rd at my weekly Dr appt the Dr suggested I have an amniocentesis the following week to see if Lorelai's lungs were mature enough to be induced. We agreed, since I was having so many issues. My hips had become increasingly worse, they both were giving out under me, I had even fallen quite a few times and bruised my hip pretty good (pretty bad?). So we were scheduled for Tuesday at 10:15 am. On Monday morning I was feeling pretty bad, and depressed. So James called in sick to help take care of Thomas and I, and just to kind of have some time together. It was a really nice day actually, we got some stuff done, and played with Thomas a lot. So Tuesday came, Michelle and MarJean came to watch Thomas and James and I went to the hospital. The nurse came out and called for Michelle, I waited a second, and since I was the only one in the waiting room said "I'm Amanda MICHELLE" and she laughed and said, "Oh, yes! Sorry, I was reading the wrong part of the form!" So we were rolled back (I was in a wheelchair) and they did a nice long ultrasound to check her out, and find a place for the needle. The dr came in and told us all of the risks, which included her being born (kinda the point of the test) and possibly nicking the umbilical cord, in which case I'd have an immediate emergency c-section. This was like a 1 in 1000 chance, but it sure sounded bad... We agreed, feeling that it was best to do the test. So they put the needle in the first time, and boy was Lorelai uncooperative! She kept moving in the way, and wouldn't stay still long enough to do the test. Well they put the needle in and Lorelai literally grabbed the umbilical cord and moved it toward the needle. Well that was too close for the Dr, so she took it out (I was fine with it! Babies safety is way more important than anything else!) unfortunately that meant that she had to put the needle in my stomach again... The second time hurt a lot more than the first. But they were able to get the sample, and then we had a NST while we waited for the results. So about half an hour later we got the results, and obviously it was that her lungs were mature! So the nurse tells us this, and speaks to my Dr on the phone, and the nurse tells us to go home, and they would call us to let us know when to get back. So long story short, we go home and wait, and wait and wait, finally about 5 hours later I called the Dr, only to find out she was trying to get a hold of me the whole time, the nurse was crazy. We were supposed to go straight from the test over to Labor and Delivery, WHAT? So we hurridly find a sitter, and get everything together, and head to the hospital. Get all checked in and they start hooking me up and what not. We got there about 5pm, they started the pitocin at around 6, and by 8 nothing was happening... We were just waiting. So I sent James to get some dinner, I knew we would be up all night and the hospital only serves food during the day. So he got some Carl's Jr and I just kind of chilled, and waited. Still nothing happened. So around 10 the Dr came in to see me, and she suggested we break my water so we can jump start everything and start doing internal monitoring because the external one wasn't working very well. So around 10:30-11 we broke my water and my contractions came in at full force. Right on top of each other, like 1 min apart. So I got the epidural, I figured there was no use in waiting, and boy was I right. I got the epidural around 11:30, and the nurse came in to check a little later, maybe 20 min, and I was at 9 cm. Before they broke my water I was 3cm. So between 11 and 11:30 I made it 6 cm, and then by midnight I was 10, and getting ready to push. The Dr came in and started getting everything ready, and by 12:30 we started to push. She was born 15 minutes later. Perfect, and beautiful. She had a full head of dark hair, and I was so excited! They let us keep her for about an hour and she nursed and we smiled and laughed and hugged her. Then they took her to the nursery for a bath, and I made my way to our room. I got all cleaned up, and James and Lorelai came back. We cuddled a while, and then I asked the nurse to take her to the nursery. I wasn't sure if I would have woken up if she cried, and James was exhausted. So we sent her to be taken care of, and slept for a few hours. Of course they kept bugging me and taking my BP and giving me shots, ect. Well the baby slept for 6 hours! I was so sad I didn't get to sleep that whole time too! The next day we had a lot of visitors, and Thomas LOVED the baby. He just wanted to hold her and kiss her, it was so adorable! He had so much fun seeing her! We left on Thursday afternoon, because I wanted to get home for Thomas. I would have liked to stay and have the nurses a little longer, but I felt like Thomas needed to come home. Well, that's the story so far! We are so excited to have her home, and we are very blessed to have such beautiful children!
Monday, May 7, 2012
Lacking
Sorry my blog posts haven't been coming as regular as I would like, but I feel like I complain so much in my posts that I almost feel bad writing them... So here are some fun bullet points, so that I can complain a little, but still have moments of happiness :)
-Thomas says so much! He repeats almost every new word he hears, including the other day when I said "Shoot!" it was really cute, but now I'm realizing how many words I say that I'm not sure I want him to say. I call him freakin' adorable all the time... I'm not sure I want him to say that to someone. James however is trying to teach him words and he refuses. He really wants him to say "homie-g" Thomas just laughs at him, which makes me laugh, and thus reinforces Thomas's giggles, it's a vicious cycle, but a really cute one!
-James and I graduated! It was great! Because I was so hugely pregnant my mom kept telling everyone that I needed this and that, so we walked in first, our names were read about 6th or 7th, and then we got to just go. We didn't sit through the rest of the 1300 names or anything. Also there was a freakin' (see I used it again!) hilarious poem, I'll see if I can find it on YouTube to share, because words cannot describe...
-Thomas kind of gave up putting himself to bed about 2 weeks ago, he just decided he wouldn't do it. So of course once he started to get out of bed we would go get him, not realizing we were teaching him that meant he didn't have to go to bed. So after a few nights on 10pm bedtimes and a few mornings of really early rising, we decided to stick to our guns and let him cry a little. He figured it out quickly. He would come to the door, and cry, and then after we didn't grab him he would crawl back in bed, whimper a little and then go to sleep. Sweet success!
-James' job is just so so. It's a bill payer, however he doesn't enjoy it, at all. And it's hard because he kind of feels slapped in the face because of how they restructured everything. They changed how it all went and he got moved, it was a totally lateral move, but he doesn't like what he does now. He is still full time, so we have benefits and he still gets paid (read "HUGE BLESSING!") but I just wish he enjoyed work more. Now it's more of a chore than ever, and I kind of hate it.
-This pregnancy is pretty much killing me. My body is not reacting to it well, and it just keeps getting worse. It started with a few issues here and there, and has grown into serious pain all the time, the inability to walk, inability to sleep, and relying on everyone around me to ensure my son is taken care of, my house is clean, and I'm existing safely. It's been really really hard on me. Every movement hurts, especially if I lift my legs. I know that sounds like something you could avoid, it's not. Think about it, walking, sitting, putting on your clothes, rolling over in bed, going to the bathroom, all of these common activities require your legs being lifted, well I can't do that. So I hobble around, James helps dress me, and I sleep horribly. But all things will end. I am having an amniocentesis tomorrow (a needle in my belly to take out some amniotic fluid to ensure Lorelai is ready to be born) and as long as the test comes back good (since she is so far along the chances are really good that they will, obviously not 100%, which is why we are doing the test, but still good) then she'll be born this week! If not then I'm going to have a complete mental breakdown and this will be my last blog post. We'll see!
-I'm actually terrified on the Amnio... just the thought freaks me out. Needles are a big issue for me, every blood draw, and shot, I just psych myself out. So knowing what's happening tomorrow, freaks me out. James is really good at distracting me, and I have figured out how to do a little mind over matter calm down, mostly it involves James talking to me, me texting, and trying to talk to him, and singing a song in my head. This way I can try to avert all my attention elsewhere. I figure if my brain is too distracted thinking of other things, I won't think about the giant needle piercing my skin... I'll let you know how it goes :)
And for today, that is all. I'm watching TV and enjoying what I hope is one of my last nights being pregnant, fingers crossed!
-Thomas says so much! He repeats almost every new word he hears, including the other day when I said "Shoot!" it was really cute, but now I'm realizing how many words I say that I'm not sure I want him to say. I call him freakin' adorable all the time... I'm not sure I want him to say that to someone. James however is trying to teach him words and he refuses. He really wants him to say "homie-g" Thomas just laughs at him, which makes me laugh, and thus reinforces Thomas's giggles, it's a vicious cycle, but a really cute one!
-James and I graduated! It was great! Because I was so hugely pregnant my mom kept telling everyone that I needed this and that, so we walked in first, our names were read about 6th or 7th, and then we got to just go. We didn't sit through the rest of the 1300 names or anything. Also there was a freakin' (see I used it again!) hilarious poem, I'll see if I can find it on YouTube to share, because words cannot describe...
-Thomas kind of gave up putting himself to bed about 2 weeks ago, he just decided he wouldn't do it. So of course once he started to get out of bed we would go get him, not realizing we were teaching him that meant he didn't have to go to bed. So after a few nights on 10pm bedtimes and a few mornings of really early rising, we decided to stick to our guns and let him cry a little. He figured it out quickly. He would come to the door, and cry, and then after we didn't grab him he would crawl back in bed, whimper a little and then go to sleep. Sweet success!
-James' job is just so so. It's a bill payer, however he doesn't enjoy it, at all. And it's hard because he kind of feels slapped in the face because of how they restructured everything. They changed how it all went and he got moved, it was a totally lateral move, but he doesn't like what he does now. He is still full time, so we have benefits and he still gets paid (read "HUGE BLESSING!") but I just wish he enjoyed work more. Now it's more of a chore than ever, and I kind of hate it.
-This pregnancy is pretty much killing me. My body is not reacting to it well, and it just keeps getting worse. It started with a few issues here and there, and has grown into serious pain all the time, the inability to walk, inability to sleep, and relying on everyone around me to ensure my son is taken care of, my house is clean, and I'm existing safely. It's been really really hard on me. Every movement hurts, especially if I lift my legs. I know that sounds like something you could avoid, it's not. Think about it, walking, sitting, putting on your clothes, rolling over in bed, going to the bathroom, all of these common activities require your legs being lifted, well I can't do that. So I hobble around, James helps dress me, and I sleep horribly. But all things will end. I am having an amniocentesis tomorrow (a needle in my belly to take out some amniotic fluid to ensure Lorelai is ready to be born) and as long as the test comes back good (since she is so far along the chances are really good that they will, obviously not 100%, which is why we are doing the test, but still good) then she'll be born this week! If not then I'm going to have a complete mental breakdown and this will be my last blog post. We'll see!
-I'm actually terrified on the Amnio... just the thought freaks me out. Needles are a big issue for me, every blood draw, and shot, I just psych myself out. So knowing what's happening tomorrow, freaks me out. James is really good at distracting me, and I have figured out how to do a little mind over matter calm down, mostly it involves James talking to me, me texting, and trying to talk to him, and singing a song in my head. This way I can try to avert all my attention elsewhere. I figure if my brain is too distracted thinking of other things, I won't think about the giant needle piercing my skin... I'll let you know how it goes :)
And for today, that is all. I'm watching TV and enjoying what I hope is one of my last nights being pregnant, fingers crossed!
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